dammit i need to prioritise between people.

OFF TO CAMP!

gonna blog when i next get my hands on a computer there =)
see you!

zomggg I'm sickkkk! LOL I totally forgot how much I hated the feeling. Yeah felt like fucking crap in the afternoon, so much so that I took a cab back.

Hmm after a good sleep I'm back up again. Fever gone, but phlegm and slight sore throut still there. You know the kind that makes you scared of coughing it out for fear of choking? Yeah that kind. When I woke up this afternoon I literally felt my skull heating up from all those worrisome thoughts buzzing and whizzing within my skull.

I must rest well or the Sunday party will be attended by one less person and it won't be fun for everyone AT ALL.

And then there's also pre-u sem and the CLIC camp to worry about.

NEVERMIND I WILL NOT THINK OF THOSE THINGS. I WILL HAVE FUN WITH NO REGRETS!!!!

In school in front of the pt now. It's so fresh. Like the sea breeze is giving me energy. After the KI 3 period tutorial...energy drainer.

Haha there's something I noticed. I don't do very well in 1-to-1 talks. Or at least I don't extremely enjoy them cuz like I need to have an observer. Like an audience. Gah so confessional. Haha. Well. Off to do some interesting handover preparations. Will be bittersweet when this is all over.

Okay this shall just be a kinda rehash of what I have to do soon by this week and the main things on my mind now. Okay. First, I have to meet sef tmr morning. Oh and I'm feeling guilty because I spammed the IPs with messages and I kept changing the circumstance. Sigh. Okay. What else. There's my screwy PW group which hasn't gotten around to do anything that we feel safe about (or maybe it's just me). And then there's the issue of OSCHOOL BEING CLOSED tmr when I can seriously go there damn quickly from plaza sing lah!! Hmmmmm. Okay. There's lit homework that I'm totally putting off because of all this mess that's why I don't feel like doing anything. That reminds me I need to go register my iPod online. What else. Um oh yeah I wanted to run through my packing list tonight but I just didn't feel like it. Another period of valuable time wasted.

Oh and the dance handover thing is so rushed! Haha I mean. There should be an increased sense of urgency to get things done from everyone. And I'm worried my video idea will sound good when it's in writing but will feel so contrived once it's actually played out! Which I think often happen to my planned joke ideas. Pardon me if i do say so myself, but my humour is SPONTANEOUS. Gahhh. Then it leads me to this: what CAN I actually do? I mean, it's starting to sound like there's utterly nothing I can do right now to help out. Sighhhh. Okay really, enough about that. What's next on the list. Ummmm. Concentrate man. You can do this. Just not so much the tasks involved.

I need to check my list. it's becoming/become my brain. I'm totally over-relying on it. Pre-U sem is next week and i'm wondering if I'm ready or not. Fuckkk there's the 30 page reader to read in preparation for the thing! Hahaha and I'm here wasting my time.

Okay I squeezed out everything but there's still some things which are bothering me. Which includes the things I think I'm missing out from this post. And the on-screen keyboard is totally getting me irritated aside from me being worried alr. Where's one of those useful softwares when you need them.

Well I'm felling in a slightly better mood alr. Just mildly troubled. But don't worry. Things'll get better. Just like they always do for me. No one likes an "emo" post.

Nic, you haven't replied, I'm totally hoping you or someone can accompany me shopping tmr. :) i'm also hoping that parents'll let me go for the outing on freaky Friday and that we have the strength, conviction, creativity and focus to do what we have to do by then and then let me go out on Sunday whole day (well almost) for the thing which required "much effort!" from us, me not excluded. That really, despite all of this, you really must wonder how great pandora was when she released Hope to the world.

Haha well, if they can actually reply my email and tell me how to register for the courses, I definitely wouldn't mind risking it and going for the courses! Oschool! Reply me by tmr or Monday please! :) the IPs are waiting for your reply as well, and I don't wanna let them down. I don't wanna let myself down either. :P I WANNA SEE SHOHEI!!! and if course learn his moves. XD

It's a Saturday morning, I slept super early last night for a Friday night. 10.40pm I think. But hey, I was really kinda tired after watching the awesome soccer girls beat the opponents, SAJC. I must say they put up a good fight though, although no goals were scored in the second half. Congrats huang!

Slightly worried not so much about work, but for the exco planning that we have to do for the farewell party. It's quite rush, but what i'm glad about is the progress we're making as a new exco :) still have got lots to sort out though, can't all be talking and no one doing anything.

OH COME ON. KRIS?!

Wth lah is really IS a popularity contest. Seriously.

Well the history test went rather well. I'm just really glad it's over and all. The worry was starting to get on my nerves. Stuck in maths lecture now, what an irony that I'm not paying attention. Just quite fed up with the subject.

What else. Well, my blogging in school shows how I've withdrawn somewhat into my shell. And it's rather interesting because it's not all that bad, I get some time to myself and my thoughts. Which gets weird when I start to over-think things.

And sometimes I just need confirmation and affirmation that what I'm doing is right. That I have no choice but to get from others.

Sigh.

FEELING LETHARGIC!!!

GOD i feel weird.

i slept in the afternoon and now it's kinda late (in my standard) but i still feel so detached and i have this vague feeling of dizzyness. ah what the heck.
anyway it's made weirder by my being sick of my music and my itunes because i haven't found a large amount of good music in awhile. also, i've got so many things to do in my to-do-list and it's like whenever i finish something using so much of my effort another thing comes up just after it. like after doing an essay i need to print it or sth. sighh. and it's the numbers that are piling up.

okay. stress. must. handle. it. too many white hairs popping up alr, everyone's pointing them out to me. must they grow in such obvious places?

anyway, eating ice cream does help because it clears up your mind. hah. more like a good-enough distraction.
thinking/ worrying about KI essay topic, because i don't really know what to do. and i feel bad if i have to share resources with simin because that would be kinda intruding upon her ground. or something or nothing. who really thinks about this kinda thing??

oh yes today and this night is weird also because it's the season finale of gossip girl and american idol and one tree hill (almost). i'm going to watch the final ep of gg right after this blogpost. and i feel like i want a picture in the blogpost.

yeah here it is. i wish i could just lie down and forget about all the things and problems i have to do or solve right now.

haha come to think of it, sometimes when we over-think about these problems it's just us over-thinking things and nothing else. =)


ZOMG WHAT??? I CAN'T BELIEVE GOSSIP GIRL IS OVER JUST LIKE THAT! HAHAHA OMG. INCREDIBLE. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET THEM COME BACK. i didn't know chuck had that kind of sweetness in him. congrats to blair! and who's that new guy in the cafe scene with the rolling stones picture? and what's up with georgina's new extremely evil look?
I CAN'T WAIT!

Maths is going to
Kill me.

Ahhh pw is getting on my nerves. On the bright side, my dad is okay with me going to clic camp :) just have to ask my mom uh-oh. I don't really know how my group stands among the other groups, and that's getting me worried. Haha. Thank god my pw teacher is really good, she been giving us good advice.

Haha I don't really know what EOM is about. Still!

I should be doing something else rather than blogging here and now. But I can't because the stress is crushing me :( oh no. Not again. Yeah my today was generally stressed. I couldn't get much done on my history essay because I didn't know and I still don't know where to start or how to go about doing it. I think I'll go consult mr Sayers tmr, if I can. I just hope I have the discipline and it doesn't go like the last time I consulted a teacher: mr Lin kuantai.

Ugh.

It's a Saturday morning, spent the morning trying to do some work but failed as far as I can remember. Haha. Working on the tiresome history essay. there's so much reading to do but I don't really have a focus. It's always been like that for history. Just don't feel like touching work much yet. I wanna do pw but groupmates aren't responding. Need to do something social, can't really concentrate by myself now. Dunno whether tonight's dinner will be enjoyable or stressful.

Sigh so right now wondering how I'm going to get myself up to do work. Don't feel like myself leh. Have a slight idea why, but stupid of me to have ever thought so. :P

Thinking about the long run, looking forward to working with shanice closely. Seems like an amicable person. Good thing is that she has unlimited smses. Bad thing is that I'm not in enough control as I would want to be when it comes to these things. Something about the nature of this role that makes me uncomfortable too. Need to find out more from sef. Or jinghan if possible.

Have any of you ever read the watchmen?

It's school assembly and they're screening the faces of the year video which I think is kinda weird. Haha the rain this mormon is killing me, it got me so darn wet. Luckily I has this extra shirt in my bag that I used to dry off. Now it's the house comm investiture thing. Sigh.

The extremely good news is, I successfully ran for vice president in dance club!!! Okay "successfully" just doesn't cut it. I DID IT!!! Hahaha yay. Now to further my plans for works domination...LOL. I'm really really happy! It just hasn't surfaced or hit me yet. I'm working with chernise, who's the new president. Expectations on me and myself are really high. I just hope my parents will understand, and be supportive. Hope I'll live up to the previous committee! They've done such an awesome job already, it's intimidating to think about even matching up.

Currently in the class of 09a11 there are three vice presidents. Rachna, szeying and myself. And later on rachel if she's made it! :)

Forgot to tell you hit about my awesome Monday, the one with the public holiday. It was really good, we enjoyed the spoils of victory. Went kboxing and it was just really cosy hanging out with everyone. Including sef who wore this orange polo tee. Hahaha very unlike him. After that left early to buy my crazy 85 dollar t shirt!! Which was nice but it's really crazy lah. Looking forward to wearing it. It's LARGE. Met leonie and daphne and the long lost GERALDINE!! Haha the pigs ate dunno how many sushi plates lah before I came. Really fun(ny) time.

Last night was the last night that I spent as an apathetic dance club member. I am now bound by duty and honour to serve more than ever before.

Wheee blogging from school again. This is so much more interesting considering that I spend so much time in school. Hahaha. Well now I can blog from anywhere in school hooray! Hmm chionging history now, everyone's doing work at the stone tables. Going to the library later to return long overdue books and also going to get a ride down to pasir ris to replace my ez link card. :) quite waste time actually, lucky have this awesome gadget. Okay this is a very aimless post, just testing it out. Whee. Sexyback.

I'm blogging using the title of the post because blogger won't. let me type in the box. Sigh. Jelly

victory is sweeeet.

it's really interesting how you forget all the bad stuff and see only the good and the little successes on the journey there. not forgetting all the people who helped and encouraged you on your way.

i'm sitting at home on my bed for the first time with my laptop. the house is dark and quiet, i hope i don't wake my brother up. i cabbed home because it was that late, just missed the last 14 bus (i presume it was). i spent lots of painful time in the shower trying to remove this glittery sticky stuff at the corner of my face. haha. it was rather raw. but i didn't succeed and it's still there. abit of eyeliner too. i think i'll sleep it off soon.

so pumped up, can't sleep anytime soon. hope my mom doesn't wake up and catch me cuz she's so prone to doing that. lol. sleep problems.

i can't really speak in my own words now, so i'll leave you with a line from somewhere.

Cuz this life is too short to live it just for you
But when you feel so powerless what are you gonna do
So say what you want
Say what you want

p.s. i think our batch of dancers are a booming bunch to work with. i'll look forward to that, and more victories like today (or should i say yesterday, because it's already 1.23am on Saturday).

it's the night before musicfest.

sorry for the long pauses before updates, but i've been really busy. song made my day when he asked me to go out. haven't spoken to him for a long long time. also, today i am especially especially really proud of my two lit essays which were done in conjunction with each other, they scored As from mr teo and i'm super proud of them and he gave me a book to go with it as well. =) i told my parents and they weren't that excited though. sighh. i've got two ulcers. what an ugly thing to say.

just went into my facebook and found 49 updates. haha. okay. well. back to my life then. see you real-life people around in school or through the phone!