haha, i was spending so much time surfing blogs and reading other stuff...i forgot that i actually had a blog.

=) thank you everyone for wishing me. it's been great. i just hope my group doesn't get too noisy or we'll disband >.< style="font-style: italic;">

So if you wanna burn yourself, remember that I love you
And if you wanna cut yourself, remember that I love you
And if you wanna kill yourself, remember that I love you
Call me up before your dead, we can make some plans instead
Send me an IM, I'll be your friend

this post doesn't have many words, i don't feel like articulating right now. please look at the pictures, the emotions are all there.

thanks everyone, for the wishing and helping me eat the cake. =) sorry, no pictures, i didn't wanna cover my phone in chocolate as well. XD

my birthday is tomorrow. gwen's birthday is tomorrow as well.
looking forward to it...and the weekend and the rite of election to be over as well haha.

this has been...an interesting, different birthday. in many ways.

haha, how now brown cow?

my god, the price of my cds are getting higher and higher. i'm bidding for

Mew - Half The World Is Watching Me / A Triumph For Man
múm - Finally We Are No One / Yesterday Was Dramatic - Today Is OK

shit. some people are nuts. ah, my limited funding.
today was OK actually. got a new group...i'll miss my old one. ADEEB, HUIJUAN, LEONIE AND WILLIE (alphabetical order). thanks for an amazing 8 months with you guys. =)

hello to Ashley, Gabriel, Kevin and XianHui! haha we're like the best group with these new seats lah. hooray~ (oh shit got 2 SC pple)

AWE;JAWGJ I NEED TO CUT MY HAIR, FORGOT ABOUT IT AHHHHHHHHHH fuck.

i just finished watching Stranger Than Fiction starring Will Ferrel(l). it's quite a good show...i just wish the ending was slightly different though. i recommend this movie if you have time, after Sweeney Todd and Paprika and The Prestige and Pan's Labyrinth.

it's like, everytime i try to do something leisurely, i get this strong feeling that i'm wasting precious work time or something...even though i think really hard and there's nothing important for me to do...maybe i'm experiencing and consciously sensing the loss of my innocent bliss.
yeah.

Down from my... ceiling
Drips great noise.
It drips on my head through a hole in the roof.

Behind these two hills here...
There's a pool.

And when I'm swimming in
through a tunnel....
I shut my eyes.

Inside their cabin I make sounds
In through the tubes I send this noise.

Behind these two hills here...
fall asleep.
And when I flood in green grass of tunnel...
It floods back.

Down from my... ceiling
drips great noise.

It drips on my head through a hole in the roof.

Behind these two hills here..
there's a pool.
And when I'm swimming in
through a tunnel....
I shut my eyes.

"I'll give you five dollars if you let me throw a rock at you."

"I think you're sick, Joshua."
"I don't feel sick.
[experimental sniff]
Not at all."

I don't give a damn what you say to me
I don't really care what you think of me
Cause either way you're gona think what you believe
There's nothing you could say that would hurt me

I hate, you now
So go away from me
You're gone, so long
I can do better, i can do better
Hey! Hey you!
I found, myself again
That's why you're gone
I can do better, I can do better

You're so full of shit
I can't stand the way you act
I just can't comprehend
I don't think that you can handle it
I'm way over, over it

Get outta my face
Hey hey
You're not my taste
Hey hey
I am so
Sick of you
You're on my nerves
I want to puke
Get outta my face
Hey hey
You're not my taste
Hey hey
Hey hey
Hey hey!

go away.
i don't wanna feel you guys anymore.
not now.
stop.

can you just leave me alone.
you don't have to love me.
you don't have to mess up my dreams right now.

Dragging their Jesus hair.
Did I escape, I wonder?
My mind winds to you
Old barnacled umbilicus, Atlantic cable,
Keeping itself, it seems, in a state of miraculous
repair.

happy easter.

=)

haha TODAY WAS ARTS DAY and i thought there was nothing to blog about.

WOOT there wasn't anything special lah first endured maths and abit of chinese which totally demoralised me THEN arts day started and i watched a short film about a malay man who lost his slippers. i liked how they played with the camera angles...and there was another short film about a delusioned boy. i kept feeling that he would jump off the hdb ledge of his home. he was really weird. lol.

then pop guitar wasn't really anything to yell about, the three dudes were good. but i think they took the whole "arts" thing too seriously, they were like talking about the musicality of the songs that they were playing. XD then rudely rushed off to catch WEST GRAND BOULEVARD and CARACEL OMGGGZZZ.

THEY WERE FANTASTIC and they managed to get the crowd going even though VJ people ain't really the most party people. but still! haha. jumped really high and i bet everyone in the whole school saw me, no one wanted to do it with me anyway -.-'' being tall is a curse sometimes i tell you. there was a mini moshy at near the front of the stage and daryl (adriel's brother) was like STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT NOW!!! =D
DAMN YOU MYSPACE, I CAN'T VIEW THEIR PICS WTFFF.

but i ran down to the hall after the performance and THANK THE LORD just caught bryan in time. took a photo with him. it's abit blur though, the girl taking the photo was really pathetic. sorry, i'm a perfectionist when it comes to photos.

the two bands were great, managed to get better pics of bryan though haha...sorry for pangsehing people along the ways =) forgive me please.

SILENCE...i kill you!

hello world, i am free now. therefore i shall blog.

yanokami concert tonight, gonna get peektures and autographs and cds! =) and múm's CDS. at the same time.

hooray for the mosaic music festival. oh, did i mention i met ms ong and her bf again at the esplanade on thursday night? XD

there is so much FUCKED UP SHIT going on in these last few days of my fucking holiday it's just screwed up, holidays don't fucking feel like fucking holidays anymore! fuck, the concert was seriously the best part, now it's just fucked up work and WORK and those people doing their O s this year, SHUT UP cuz i don't think you have anything worth complaining about right now.

i seriously cannot stand this. someone give me a glass of iced water now.
i mean, what the fuck. there's just this limit to projects or assignments that you can't cross; now you've crossed it. i just want to STAY AT HOME and do work, with NOTHING ELSE in my life right now except the outings that i've PREPARED for.

ah, my parents, my parents, my parents. they don't fucking help either. come up to me a couple of days before and say "oh, we've taken off this friday, make sure your schedule's free that day so we can BRING YOU OUT WHAT THE FUCK FIRST YOU DON'T EVEN TELL ME THAT YOU'RE DOING THAT, NOW I HAVE TO CLEAR MY FUCKING SCHEDULE AND JUST SO THAT YOU CAN FUCKING WASTE MY TIME AND TAKE ME OUT? DUDE! ENOUGH ALREADY. I AM BUSY. AND AT LEAST HAVE THE FUCKING COURTESY to tell me more in advance!

my OWN com. that is what i need right now. something of my own. something where i can start organising and putting down stuff and that i can use whenever i want and no FUCKING 12 midnight limit cuz i've crossed it with work and i'm gonna do it again. and STOP FUCKING WAKING ME UP AT 9 just to have breakfast with you. i have a life. i don't wanna be dragged around. work and my own life. keep telling me to be independent? that's right, keep walking away. and don't turn back, except when you REALLY feel something.

it's not my parents' fault. but you get the general idea. WORK.

it's 10.38 on a monday the 10th of march 2008 and i have just realised the brilliance of sylvia plath in just one of her poems, which i think is definitely a god-send and a target of potentially inwardly destructive power.

i may not know much now, but heaven help me in opening up my mind and at the same time clenching it to channel as much as i can towards my dear Sara Bellum and hopefully, possibly, the world.

imsick
idontfeelwell
butimnotsick.

it's the fuckin hols, omg.

sorry to kitmeng,yiwen and kashish. XD

yellow, today was one of the coolest days in my life.

it's the LAST DAY OF FRIGGIN SCHOOL so we (adeeb, jingrong, tim, willie and me) went to watch a movie. i wanted to watch juno. but, apparently we were really too late...so we watched 10 000 BC on the BIG SCREEN instead. the graphics were so amazing, it didn't strike me as graphics until after the show when everyone talked about it...shows how good it was haha!

after that, adeeb and jingrong went home. family time and all that, you know? =)

timlim, willie and i were left, so we decided to walk on orchard road since we were already at orchard and it would be pointless to just go home, or we might as well have watched it at tampines mall or something. haha. yeah so we walked and a couple of minutes later we saw Mr James Koh and Ms Ong walking together too. so we waved hi. it was the first time i saw him in person that i remember! the interview was abit hazy to me haha. i can't say whether he was good looking or not, he was wearing this pair of sunglasses that covered his eyes (duh) and i think the eyes make or break a face.


guys aren't really made for shopping. so we visited topshop at wisma and walked to far east plaza as well. and i cracked the lucky plaza joke (thanks xh!) that made them laugh hard.
after that, i felt kinda mealy so we went to the coffee bean and tea leaf and i only had a chicken pie which costed 5 bucks OW my wallet. and i'm filling (feeling, geddit? XD) hungry now. -.-'' had a good long chat which consisted of reader response theories and religion and politics and BJORK and sociology and stuff. brilliant brilliant conversation that lasted most of the night. i really lost myself then. it's these amazing rare occasions that i live for, but i don't realise it until it's already past and i look back.

i intimidate people huh.

everyone, have a brilliant holiday, and hope you get some rest even though work is catching up to leisure. there are so many things planned for me and i need help remembering the dates =) really really hope i don't screw anything up!

*i'm happy that Charissa enjoyed the camp!* smilessmilessmilessmiles! =)))

holy fuck, this guy is - something else!! - fantastic song...and that ain't the only thing fantastic about it...



<3

it's 10.30pm i have a maths test and a full day of school tomorrow and late-night bowling (i don't think i'll go for dinner) and i'm staying up listening to Robyn and Lightspeed Champion WTF is coming over me omg.

i have to sleep for friday. planning my sleep in advance, what the hell. you know, i feel like REALLY going out then. like, anyone up for bringing clothes to change then going out and watching a movie and then go walking around orchard till late, then we go clubbing?

okay, kidding about the clubbing part. but still on the rest.

getting high just thinking about friday. holidays probably haven't struck me yet.

The Bird and The Bee - Again and Again

omg this one is good. ^^
cantstopcantstopcantstop watching these stupid videos!! hahaha!

AND


anybody? =)

múm
electronica
13th March, Thursday
7.30pm
Esplanade concert hall
tix @ $60

yanokami
jazz/electronica
15th March, Saturday
7.30pm
Esplanade recital studio
tix @ $25 (zomfg!!!)

i was just listening to this song and thought the lyrics were really good.

Robyn - Be Mine

It's a good thing, tears never show in the pouring rain
As if a good thing ever could make up for all the pain
There'll be no last chance to promise to never mess it up again
Just a sweet pain of watching your back as you walk
As I'm watching you walk away
And now you're gone it's like an echo in my head
And I remember every word you said

It's a cold thing you never know all the ways I tried
It's a hard thing faking a smile when I feel like I'm falling apart inside
And now you're gone it's like an echo in my head
And I remember every word you said

And you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

For the first time, there's no mercy in your eyes
And the cold wind is hitting my face and you're gone
And you're walking awayAnd I'm helpless sometimes
Wishing's just no good
Cause you don't see me like I wish you would

Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

There's a moment to seize everytime that we meet
But you always kept passing me by
But you never were, and you never will be mine

(I saw you at the station, you had your arm around
Whats her name? She had on that scarf I gave you
you got down to tie her laces)

Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
(You looked happy and that's great)
No, you never were, and you never will be mine
(I just miss you, that's all)

Cause you never were, and you never will be mine
No, you never were, and you never will be mine

There's a moment to seize everytime that we meet
But you always kept passing me by
No, you never were, and you never will be mine