wow.

the first couple of days of school are over.

and i'm NOT looking forward to the stress.

i can already feel it in my bones, the things that're gonna come that'll make my mind rattle and my brain ache and my heart dead.

wow so melodramatic.

yeah but something like that lah, i just know how to put it in words because that's probably what i'll feel soon. sigh.

yeah but we'll look back and think "wow, what amazing times we had. the fun of this stress."

or maybe not. married adults i know still have nightmares about their A levels. coupled with concert in term 2, i don't know how to juggle my priorities any more.

well the main dampener tonight is that i just found out that i'll have to not sleep in on weekends (saturdays) in order to attend practice. gah 8.30 to 10.30 is really early. blame it on me on not planning my steps well, but the small, very small comfort is that it's only for 6 weeks or so. which is a month and a half. after that...well it's all over. one focus and one focus only, which can really take its toll.

i mean, being older sucks. what fun is growing old, when you don't have the increased amount of happiness to deal with the increased amount of stress? whatever we have, we have to work for it. and maybe sometimes, just sometimes, it can be abit too much.

yeah. so that's my two cents on what occurred to me today in the bus in the morning. it's 10.45pm on the computer clock. waking up early tmr to attend yet another meeting.

six weeks, six weeks. somehow it just seems so far away. and then time will pull the rug from under you once again, like how it did for almost the whole of last year.

i'll move forward, we all have to. it's just the thought of leaving things behind that's terrifying. just sometimes.

don't you sometimes wish you could disappear into that world of your wallpaper?